A Book, but First…

If the Army decides that it will let me deploy, I have every intention of writing a book. Now, I make no claims of being an actual writer or anything like that, nor do I intend to write a best-selling book that will be read by millions, though that would not be a bad thing. My vision for this book is a “war journal” of some type, though not about the actual war, at least directly. Simply daily thoughts on whatever was on my mind that day, at least a page in length for the duration of the deployment.

In order to do this, however, I need to get some practice writing something everyday. So for the month of June, I will be blogging here everyday. Some days I might simply journal but then blog it later when I have access to the internet again. But everyone says a habit is develped after 21 days of doing something, so hopefully it will be an enduring habit that follows through that would enable me to journalize my deployment experience.

So check back here June 1st, and every day after that, for all sorts of blogging goodness. Maybe you’ll be entertained. Maybe you’ll be bored. But maybe you will witness something super fancy as I learn how to blog something every day. Hope you enjoy!

Stupid, Idiotic Things from Work

So, here’s the thing. Every day is another day that something happens at my job that is retarded and can’t happen in the private sector, at least it seems so stupid that it must be only an Army thing. The past couple of days, however, have been something that I have not experienced in my four years of working for the Army Reserve. A few instances stand out, so I will start with the one that happened first and how everything else has just spiraled out of control since then.

1) I am sick of the assumption by the powers that be that we will stay in our jobs no matter what. Everyone seems to think that we are going to be around for ever, hence them not caring much when awards get returned due to “administrative errors” and not resubmitting them. Or telling us that we can’t deploy because we are too valuable but not fighting to keep us around with said bonuses and other awards. I have informed those above me that I would like to deploy; I have an opportunity with a sister unit and it would really be beneficial for me, both financially and for my military career. The response I get is “You can’t deploy with a unit that you don’t work for without a waiver.” I understand that; just fill out the damn waiver and let somebody more important than you make that decision. I have already decided that if I am not allowed to deploy, I am quitting my job to do so. They can’t say anything then. Either way, they are losing me for a year or more, but at least if they let me go on my terms, I may come back afterward. That doesn’t look so likely in either case now. I may just move back to Utah as planned and really leave them in a lurch.

2) Integrity. It is one of the Army values that is instilled from day one of Basic Training. But when you are called out for doing something you are not supposed to do, you don’t lie and say you are not doing it. Admit your “mistake,” take the punishment and move on. One of our full-timers has apparently been moonlighting as a mechanic for the local transit authority, outside of duty hours, but it has been affecting his performance at work. I know this because his other supervisor called me to confirm some stuff…not really my place, so I passed it on to his unit. When his unit tries to take care of it, he denies that he is working this second job. Whatever, loser. I hope that they have no qualms about separating you and your deadbeat wife from the program.

3) Power-hungry c**** (for lack of a better word): Just because you finally get paid what you think you are worth doesn’t suddenly make you the person in charge. It doesn’t really work that way, sweetheart, but thanks for playing. Apparently when you attend conferences and other training, you don’t pay attention. I make more than you, but I never claim to be your boss, but maybe I should. Or do you think you make more than me too? I don’t think so. I don’t care that you went to Baylor or that you studied abroad in Europe, or that you may have worked for USARSO. Just shut up and work your 40 hours a week, and actually work them, not just some bullshit numbers on a fraudulent time card. If you want to be an officer, get your fat ass off the couch and lose some weight so you can stop wearing that girdle everywhere. Maybe pass a PT test too and get DMOSQ. I know I want to be an officer too and that I am not ready to do it, but I don’t walk around saying that people are going to be sorry when I am because then I’ll really be in charge. I cry bullshit yet again.

Grr…I hate my job! Most (90%) of the people that I work with and interact on a daily basis are fine and I don’t mind them. It’s the other 10% or so that really irritate the shit out of me. I want them to go away. One has left; only four more or so to go.

Why co-workers and the office environment suck

This is purely an opinion piece and not based on scientific facts or anything, but here goes:

It’s easy to trace this dilemma to two things: humankind’s natural tendency to be hunter/gatherers and society’s general apathy towards work. The first is something that has developed since the beginning of time, when man first stood erect and decided that he was hungry. Without anything else to assuage this hunger, man decided to find some way to fill this need. He had a mouth, but all it did was make noise. He had fingers, but all they did was scratch things. So the first upright man, we’ll call him “Steve,” was walking along one day, rubbing his belly and trying to figure out why it hurt so bad. Since he wasn’t paying attention, he tripped over a rock and into his mouth went some dirt. He accidentally swallowed this dirt, and his stomach did not hurt nearly as bad. Thus began Steve’s quest to find something else to fill his belly. He tried more dirt, but eventually grew tired of its grainy feel. He ate leaves and twigs, but couldn’t stand the taste. He happened upon berries; some tasted good but made him sick, and others tasted good and didn’t make him sick. He stuck with the ones that didn’t make him sick. To make a long story short, eventually he gathered all of the berries and there were no more. He shared them with the other people who began to walk upright, but, being human, they wanted more, and with the discovery of fire by Steve’s neighbor Joe, other options became available. Berry Soup wasn’t good all the time, so Steve set out to look for different foods. While on his journey, he witnessed a Saber-tooth Tiger eating the remains of some Wooly Mammoth. Steve thought to himself “ugh ugh ugh ugh,” which roughly translated means “I bet I could eat that part, too.” So Steve enlisted the help of his neighbors Joe, Ed, and Donna (she was very manly, but that is a tale for different times), and they went off to slay a mammoth. Yada, yada, yada…they became hunters. So, after this long-winded story that you probably just skimmed, Boo Boo Kitty Fuck! Just seeing if you were paying attention. This history makes it difficult for humankind to want to work in an office environment, mainly because we want to be out hunting and gathering. So that means that only certain occupations lead to enjoyable “work”: farming, winemaking, and being Ted Nugent. Everything else sucks ass.

Number two reason that working in an office sucks is work itself. There are too many distractions from work to keep us at work. It could be a nice day outside, or you want to take a nap, or you hate the people you work with. Work just isn’t enjoyable for 98f the working popualtion. If anyone out there actually likes their job, they really don’t like it per se. The like the idea of it and bringing home a paycheck and not being poor. As I mentioned before, the only people who truly find happiness in their every daily work are farmers, winemakers, and Ted Nugent. Sure you may like what you do, but isn’t there always something else you would rather be doing every second you are at work? Be honest…thought so. In this consumer-based society, money is the root of everything. If you have none, you are a failure, and if you have some, you want more. Until you acquire every single cent that is left in the world, you will continue to want more and hate your job more. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you are happy making X dollars per year, or that going into business for yourself will make it better. The simple solution:

WE SHOULD ALL HAVE CREDITS!

Thank you, and until next time…

P.S. Ask me what credits are. I dare you…