Part One: Changes a-Comin’

Before answering the question posed here, I am going to discuss a bit more on this subject first. That will give y’all more time to answer my hypothetical about winning the lottery, which, by the way, I did not win last week. Somebody did win Mega Millions though, so that jackpot is back down to only $25 million.

Today was an important day as I move into the next phase of my life. After waiting for a response from the powers that be on how long they were going to let me keep working here, I decided to stop waiting for them and retake ownership over my life. I complained previously how I felt that this job is sapping my creative vibe and just making me feel miserable in general with my life.

I almost left on Thursday last week, never to return. The Army is not a very efficient organization, and I have known this for the 10 1/2 years I was in, as well as the 6 1/2 years that I have worked here. But Thursday was a special lesson in how stupid things can be here some time. I won’t bore you with all the particulars, but the main gist was that something I had done a week prior needed to be done differently for no good reason. After days of struggles trying to get something accomplished, the Army says that things change at teir whim, counter to previous guidance.

That was the tipping point, but it has been growing for some time. I know longer feel the need to waste my time here jumping through hoops. I’d rather spend my time elsewhere being creative and trying to move on. There are some things that I want to do in the near future; some of these things will probably never make me any money, but I am trying to be happy. I feel like I am entitled to at least a few months of unemployment after working non-stop for over ten years. Having a bit more time will allow me to do other things, perhaps even find a new job if that is the route I decide to take.

I am leaving on my terms, for the most part. I could have just left earlier, but by giving myself another few weeks, it will help set me up to be able to walk away. I fully anticipate that my notice today will finally create some sort of communication in regards to my situation. whatever. I am leaving with my head held high, getting away from this toxic environment. The people that I care about will still be in my life, but I think it will be better to get away from some of these people that I don’t like. I am excited for what is happening next, and I hope that you will follow along as I reveal over the next few weeks what is next in my life.

Until next time…

Prologue: Changes a-Comin’

After feeling particularly sorry for myself over the past week or so, I have decided that I am going to stop complaining and actually make some changes in my life. I am going to start doing the things that will make me happy and stop worrying about everything. I have a lot of exciting plans and thoughts in the upcoming couple of weeks, so stay tuned for the next things coming up. I have alluded to one of my plans a few times over the past week, and as things fall more into place, I’ll put them up here, and you will hopefully see them on Twitter and Facebook and possibly elsewhere.

In the meantime, thank you everyone for the kind words of encouragement and just generally being around to deal with me over the past week or so. Your support is very much appreciated and will be needed as I further continue on with some of my plans. I truly do hope that many changes are in store over the rest of this year and beyond.

Until next time…

General Frustration With Things

I’ve been officially back from my deployment for four months today. I seriously thought by now that it would be different, that I would actually be moved on to the next phase of my life, that my little tax business would be a little successful, that I wouldn’t have to be working for the Army anymore. Granted, this is all partially my fault. I’m not really fully invested in the company as I probably should be, neglecting a lot of the free marketing or contacts that I could be doing. I don’t nearly take enough time focusing on the business as I should, but this is partly due to the fact that my job with the Army hasn’t ended yet.

I was hoping that being forced away from work would encourage me to get my act together, but I find myself falling into the same traps as before, relying on the paycheck from a job I don’t like to meet my obligations. Part of it is that it is easier for sure, and now that I may have received a temporary reprieve, I fear that I am going to work up to the end of my tenure here and then go off into the world without any future plans established.

I have thoughts and plans what I would like to do for sure, but right now I feel like I have no motivation for anything. I’ve been trying to keep this blog updated three times a week, and twice a week over at Eberhard Tax, but I have been finding it difficult to do so. It is not even due to a lack of things to write; tax blogs nearly write themselves, and I have a lot of stuff started for this blog here that I just need to finish. For someone that aspires to (maybe) be a writer someday, I don’t feel that I am writing enough to hone this as my craft.

Aside from the writing thing, life doesn’t feel like it is going that well right now. It’s a daily struggle to keep a positive outlook. I often feel like I am going through the motions, that what I do will have no effect on outcomes in the future. I do realize that my little corner of the world is not as nearly as bad as other parts of the world. I’m sure the people in other parts of the world would trade their current situation to live in my emo existence, but this is my blog.

Many of these posts talk about my trials and tribulations with the female of the species. I’m fairly passive when it comes to my interactions with women. Part of this is because I have never really dated anyone, so I have no “game.” Not that I want game necessarily; I try to be me all the time and just hope that a girl will make the first move. I don’t deal with rejection well, so I don’t put myself out there nearly as much as I probably should.

Again, purely my fault. It is still frustrating though. Combine that with my general malaise towards life right now and I just don’t really have any hope. Three weeks or so marks my three year “anniversary” from being divorced, and I thought I would be at a different point in my life by this point in all honesty. I would love to find a healthy relationship and hopefully get married again, but I also admit that, as of right now, I’m not a 100% ready for marriage. But in order to get married again, I would think that I would have to be dating at some point. I don’t know what the answer is at this point. Again, this is just general frustration with the way that I feel my life is going right now.

If you are still reading at this point, thanks. Ultimately, I am still optimistic for the future. Four months is a small sample size of what is about to come in my life. But it’s frustrating nonetheless. I hope that my future posts get a little more uplifting, so keep reading.

Until next time…

It’s Official

The day that I knew was coming finally came earlier this week. I have been issued my dreaded “30-day” letter, putting me on notice that since I am no longer in the Reserves that I will no longer have a job in 30 days. Even though I knew the day was coming, it was still something that is never fun, though after this week of doing everybody else’s work, I think I am ready to leave.

I do have a 15-day window in which I can submit documents and other stuff on my behalf to try and keep my job. I still think that I am going to request more time since I still have not found another job, and the US Code in which I was hired under says that I need to be removed “within a year of losing Reserve status.” It would at least allow for me to continue getting paid, though the sooner I get of the Army payroll, the sooner I can collect unemployment if need be. That plus my fancy Post-9/11 GI Bill should help me meet my expenses and whatnot for the time being, but who knows for how long.

I have applied for another job within the Army that I think I would do really well at. We’ll see if the Army feels the same way. Otherwise, I will continue to look for other jobs and hope for the best, while trying to find a way to really start what I think I can do. I really just need to finish up this accounting degree so I can at least get in the door somewhere and hopefully start accumulating some sort of accounting experience, though I really do not want to ever have a boss again. Until I get a large amount of money, however, it may be my only option. Becoming the next Warren Buffett may have to wait for a few more years. As always, we’ll see.

In the meantime, I’m going to get back to blogging more frequently. I really do want to finish my Germany leave blogs and put some stuff up that I wrote while deployed, and blogging over at Eberhard Tax has been lacking as well. Hopefully, you’ll see this in your little blog roll and click to read it, and I will continue to update enough to keep you interested.

Until next time…